who let the blogs out?

51 Inches (or why bigger isn't necessarily better)

2012-02-10T13:40:00.000-08:00

Today we are hooking up our new 51" Samsung plasma TV to our new wireless receiver. According to Uverse customer service it's really simple to do.

Why am I skeptical?

I generally have a positive outlook. I'm the glass-half-full girl in most situations. But ever since I was in grade school, anything that involved electronics (yes, even back then we had electronics...slide carousels, film strips, projectors, microphones, speakers) they NEVER worked without some major drama first. We would sit in the classroom or auditorium during what would seem like an eternity waiting for the show to go on while sweat-drenched teachers scurried and flustered to figure-it-out!

The very same thing happened in the corporate world.

Even at home I get an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach when someone wants to watch a DVD. Thoughts of which remote, which button and which cable dance in my head and invariably it takes an eternity to figure-it-out! (Can't we just watch it on the computer?)

So....wish me luck!

Can't Sleep...Again

2012-01-31T00:47:00.000-08:00

I'm tossing and turning in bed tonight, trying not to wake up my husband, while visions of unemployment, bills and the future dance in my head.

This happened once before in the Eighties. Both of us were laid off at the same time and it was a true paradox because we had more money than ever before thanks to severance packages. So while we had time off together we took our two kids to Galveston. What can I say? We were young. And stupid. Or maybe we were smart. Everything turned out okay. We both found jobs fairly fast, never missing a beat. (Suze Orman would have denied this trip!)

We've been going to church ever since our son died. For the first time in our lives we have a real spiritual thirst and we want answers. Where did he go? I'm not proud that it took a catastrophe like this to bring us closer to God...but what am I going to do...lie about it? That's one of the big 10!

(I know you're wondering where this is going, but I promise to tie up the loose ends shortly.)

So my husband decided to start reading The Bible...a little bit each day. One day this summer, while I was still employed, he was reading Philippians by the pool and stopped to pray. "Dear God, we just need enough money so that we don't have to worry." Then he looked down and the next line he read said, Do not worry. When he relayed this to me I felt it was nothing short of a miracle! And I keep reminding myself of these simple but comforting words.

So I'm going to bed now--and I'm not going to worry.

Philippians 4:4-9 (New Revised Standard)

4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. 5 Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. 6 Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9 Keep on doing the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you.

It's Seventy and Sunny in January!

2012-01-19T13:27:00.000-08:00

New Year's Resolutions (in no particular order)

2012-01-03T05:04:00.000-08:00

1. organize office

2. get back on diet

3. search for employment

4. read more

5. write more

6. prepare for global disasters

7. cut up credit cards

8. finish recovering ottoman

9. dust off treadmill

10. sign up for piano lessons

The Christmas Letter I Didn't Send

2011-12-27T08:13:00.000-08:00

Despite the reason this holiday season should have been the most sorrowful time of the year, it wasn't. All the merry festivities were actually fun and helped take my mind off the twists and turns that caused 2011 to suck big-time.

Let's recap:

The year started off uneventful. Nothing of major consequence happened in January.

In February we were so proud to hear (after being unemployed for 2 years,) our 26-year-old son landed a maintenance job at Walmart.

In March we realized there were some logistic problems with his commute from our house to his work, so he started making plans for his own place.

In the middle of April the printing company my husband worked at for nearly 11 years shuttered its doors. It was a small, family owned business so there wasn't any severance pay, 401K conversion decision or retirement package. It was a handshake and one final check for unused vacation.

While we were still reeling from that slap in the face, the real bomb of 2011 exploded on April 30 when we had to discontinue life support for our son. Others would argue that his life ended April 29 when he accidentally overdosed on heroin, causing him to be brain dead, but I'm going with the date on his death certificate.

On May 1st, which was to be our son's moving day, we forfeited the deposit on his new apartment instead. We had a lovely and meaningful memorial service on May 5.

"So, okay, 2011, ease up on us," I thought to myself. "We have had about all we can handle." But 2011 must have known our limitations better than we did.

In June my creative director sat in my office guest chair and began to relay a rumor. Her words rocked my very foundation, which was still pretty shaky from April. My brain tried, but couldn't quite grasp what "voluntary" early retirement package (VERP) for associates 55 and older could mean.

On June 11 I turned 55.

July brought more rumors. Phrases like pension, years of service and SRP littered the office banter.

By September the rumor became official. The company and the job I had adored and given 23 years of absolute devotion wanted me to leave. Why? Seemingly because of my age. Isn't that illegal? Well, evidently not if you're offered lots of money (heretofore known as a retirement package), in exchange for your signature that you won't bring up the age discrimination thing in a court of law.

The month also brought some good news finally! My daughter and her husband called to tell us they were expecting our first grandchild.

At the beginning of October we rented out our upstairs space to a new room mate so we could afford to stay in our large suburban home.

A few days before October 15 (the deadline to accept the VERP), my creative director (who was also 55 and over) walked me over to HR assuring me it was for good news. Not only was I being early retired, but my job was being eliminated. That entitled me to (in addition to the retirement package) a severance package (heretofore known as a lump sum) and qualified me for unemployment.

In the middle of October our daughter called to say she had miscarried.

At the end of October I packed up my office and without ceremony, left my cubicle, my long-time younger friends, my creative writing job and the modern campus-style building that's only a 10-minute drive from home.

In November I started looking for new employment "opportunities" even though I was officially on the payroll until December 1. This new "downtime" also gave me plenty of time to think about how much I missed my son.

In December I joined my husband (he's still getting government checks, thanks to Obama's extensions) and signed up for unemployment.

And that brings us to today. The packages (and lump sums) have been received, the eggnog is but a sweet memory and our real pine Christmas tree is losing needles at an alarming rate. In light of it all, I'm in good spirits.

I really need to lay off the history channel, though. It's armageddon week on H2. If 2011 was a prick, 2012 is predicted by the Mayans and Nostradamus to be a real bitch.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Karyn

"Dog"ter Zhivago

2011-01-21T22:34:00.000-08:00

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

2010-12-17T21:22:00.000-08:00

Happy Halloween!

2010-10-31T13:21:00.001-07:00

Michael Jackson says, "Say no to prescription drugs."

Soooo '00!

2010-10-10T06:26:00.000-07:00

As I near the end of a decade, I always wonder what fashion trends will define it. Like in 50 years, when they say, "Let's all dress up like the 00s for Halloween" (like we dress in poodle skirts and bobby sox for the 50s) what will we wear?

Well, let's see. The glitz and glam of the two-thousands made sequins acceptable workwear, thrilled with the frill of ruffles, declared the same acid green of the 60s as the new black, made metallic the fabric of our lives, accessorized with S&M paraphernalia and proved that the animal print was still alive and well and kicking in our closets.

Animal skins went wilder than any Cro-magnon ever dreamed!

I admit it. Just the other day I pinned a faux leopard fur collar (that I saved from the 80s) to my jean jacket. And I have a whole "zoo" of animal print handbags (zebra, giraffe, gator, etc.)

During the '00s you could find animal prints EVERYWHERE!

Top...

to bottom...

inside...

and out...

a kid's best friend...

a man's best friend...

And a girl's best friend:

What? A cow's an animal, too! Can she help it if her hide isn't a print?

And even baby's best friend...

Soooo '00--combining both glitzy metallic and animal print into one trendy boot (that the kid will outgrow in a month--only $68 at Saks.)

Guys weren't afraid to express their inner animal either! Grrrr...

And how can we talk about the animal trend without a shoe...in this case a boot--sort of.

I think the open-toed shoe/boot has some staying power so we may have to save that look for our "teens decade" halloween costume.

Anyway...here's my prediction. For our "Remember 2000" party we will don animal print in all its glory. I already picked out my costume:

Man, I can't wait! Problem is in 50 years I'll be well over 100--if I live that long...but that's a whole 'nother blog post.

5 Star Reviews on Amazon!

2010-09-25T16:31:00.000-07:00

Ms. Lyndon does it again., September 25, 2010

By	Duke of Earle (Victoria, TX United States)

This review is from: For Richer or Repo (Paperback)

I really enjoyed her first offering, so I thought I'd give "For Richer or Repo" a try. Now, I'm not really much of a fan of chick lit (okay, for you purists that's "light women's fiction"), but "CurvyKathy31" was a hoot and I was curious if she could follow up with another winner.

Let's put this in perspective: If you're a reader who likes slowly developing, thought provoking literary works that leave you examining the various levels of metaphors, similes, character arc, social dynamic and other devices employed by the author, this book may not be your cup of tea. But if you enjoy a quick read with characters you can relate to, really clever dialogue, a plot that gives you whiplash as it turns on itself, a look inside each character's head as the point-of view shifts among them all, a diverting tale that starts out seeming predictable (poor-little-rich-girl) but surprises you, and a satisfying ending . . . well, this might be exactly your glass of diet Coke.

The electronic version is cheaper, but I'm one of those old-fashioned people who likes to hold a book in his hands, so I bought the paperback (great cover art!). Go to the Wings ePress web site and download the PDF if you like to save money.

In my book, Karyn Lyndon is now 2 for 2. I may be on my way to becoming an official fan (at least of THIS author's version) of chick lit.

I'm now wondering if she can go 3 for 3.

Stay tuned.

Meredith G. Schorr "Merry Writer" (New York, New York)

This review is from: For Richer or Repo (Kindle Edition)

With its endearing cast of characters, For Richer or Repo had me engaged from page one. Written in a "chick-lit" voice, For Richer or Repo is part romantic comedy, part mystery suspense and a whole lot of fun. As in her first novel, CurvyKathy31 Confessions of a Chataholic, Karyn Lyndon's witty and original voice shines through. After having read both her novels, I look forward to a third.

Coitus Interruptus

2010-09-20T21:00:00.000-07:00

Sheldon: So are you and Leonard still not having coitus?

Penny: Do you have to say coitus? Can't you just say we aren't seeing each other?

Sheldon: No, because that wouldn't be true. You and Leonard still technically see each other all the time.

Penny: Still, I'd prefer if you wouldn't use that word.

Sheldon: "Well, all right. I'll just substitute intercourse."

Penny: "Great."

Sheldon: "...or fornication...but that has judgmental overtones so I'll hold that in reserve."

Penny: "Fine."

Sheldon: "Just to be clear, do I have to stop saying coitus with everyone or just you?"

Penny: "Ummmm...everyone."

Sheldon: "Harsh terms but all right."

Penny: "Naaah! I'm just coitusing with ya!"

(simulated dialog from the Big Bang Theory when I laughed my gluteus maximus off)

Junction With Attitude!

2010-09-09T01:27:00.000-07:00

This crossing was brought to you by the letters F and U...

The Zodiac Room at Neiman Marcus

2010-09-04T21:16:00.001-07:00

What else is there to say but amoeba-shaped silver napkin rings, ten-dollar bottles of sparkling water, tiny cups of broth, warm popovers with strawberry butter, lobster bisque and fruit topped with poppy seed dressing...

Yes, it was a little extravagant. But like the Mastercard commercials say about being priceless...this lunch was!

Why?

Because it was a little respite, amidst the emotions of a funeral, the anti-climax of a wedding, the tribulations of deadlines and the ills of dysfunction, when my mother, my daughter, my son and I shared a moment of genteel grace.

I predict that for years to come we will reminisce of this day.

In Case You've Forgotten

2010-09-03T05:54:00.000-07:00

Wings-Press.com

Time Off For Dead Behavior

2010-09-02T17:42:00.000-07:00

Went to a funeral today for my Uncle Ben. He was a great dad, model husband, all-around sweet guy and really smart, too. But that's not what this is about. This is about funerals in general. Okay, I admit it. I like them (as long as the honoree lived a long, full life.) They are little mini family reunions right in the middle of the week! Everyone stops what they are doing, gets dressed up, heads to the church and reflects on the meaning of life (and death).

Then we all lined up in our parking-lighted vehicles and got a police escort through a bunch of major intersections (cool) and since we were near the end of the procession the police car, lights blazing, would pass me to catch up to the next crossing. And every single time my heart stopped, feeling as though I'd done something wrong. (I had no idea I was so paranoid--or forgetful--I'm going to lay off the Equal.)

The other passengers in my car didn't want to participate in the processional--said it was too slow. But I insisted, assuring them it would be the quickest way. By the time we got to the burial site everyone agreed with me. A police escort can be fun!

A slight drizzle added ambience to the canopy and cooled off what would have been a sweltering 90 down to 70. Did I mention the pall bearers (cousins' sons including mine) looked handsome in their suits?

Tomorrow I'll tell you about going to Neiman Marcus in Downtown Dallas to the Zodiac Room for lunch. Riveting, I assure you!

Labor (Day) Pains

2010-09-01T20:42:00.000-07:00

August--wow--what a month! It's been tough editing the book in the middle of hosting a wedding and trying to get in as much pool time as possible. But I made it!

Now I'm ready to go back-to-school shopping. (No--I'm not a student and I don't have any school-age kids.) But, like ducks gathering in formation and heading south, I can feel it--it's instictive! Even though the high was 92 today, the magnetism of the mall beckons--time to shop for sweatery knits in earth tones and closed-toe shoes. (Goodbye flip-flops--sniff...) Okay, I admit it, there are only about 4 or 5 days in Texas when the weather is prohibitive for sandals.

About the only "fashion don't" I adhere to is no white shoes after Labor Day. So, like the sands through the hour glass, so are the days for my silver-studded, white leather flip-flops (and the cute white bag I got to match at Charming Charlies.)

Do I sound shallow?

Well, I blame that on my mother. How I long for the days when she would take me shopping (read pay for it) every single Saturday while my Dad played golf. At the change of seasons I would come home with so many shopping bags I couldn't remember what was in them. Then I'd have to decide what to wear the first day of school. Did I go for the most trendy outfit which invariably involved long sleeves, ribbed knit and wool plaid? Or did I ease into it, saving my favorite for the third or fourth day, hoping against hope for a cool front to blow in? This was back in the good ol' days when school didn't start until after Labor Day. Summer was three solid months long and seemed to go on forever...

Anyway, after all that shopping during my childhood, I suppose it's fitting I write fashion copy for a department store. But we're working on Christmas right now. My next project is a spring direct mail piece...ahhh...flip-flop season already!

Here it is...my new cover!

2010-07-23T21:48:00.001-07:00

And how 'bout that fancy dog dish

2010-07-10T04:32:00.001-07:00

Hopefully he's not electrocuted by all of the fans...

He's not spoiled or anything...

2010-07-10T04:27:00.000-07:00

New pic especially for Jennifer Lancaster

2010-06-09T15:38:00.000-07:00

This is Chester. He and Maisy should have a play date sometime--except I live in Texas.

Hey, Jen. If you wrote shorter book titles you'd have more room for your name!

I Sold Some More Books...

2010-04-10T18:34:00.000-07:00

I went to a writing class today on Goal, Motivation and Conflict and was able to sell a few books to some "fans". Pretty exciting stuff!

The Real Live Book!

2010-03-29T08:17:00.000-07:00

Here it is...up close and personal and ready for your purchase!

CurvyKathy31: Confessions of a Chat-aholic...

2010-01-16T19:16:00.000-08:00

...is scheduled for a February 2010 release! Here's the cover...isn't it cute!

Here's what it says on the back:

Kathy is a cute, plump, hearing-her-clock-tick Assistant Buyer at PandorasBox.com, a home accents retailer. She has three goals in life. The first goal is to find a man with major spark-age. The second is to give up her addiction to the Information Date-way as her friends and mother have suggested. The last goal is to keep a low profile while she attempts to direct a successful musical “extravaganza” for the company's 10th Anniversary.

This tale hints of Jane Eyre, Cyrano de Bergerac and The Scarlet Letter while taking a humorous look at falling in love, break-up angst, wacky corporate America and most everything that can go wrong with Internet dating.

Cold Dog, Get Your Cold Dog Right Here!

2010-01-16T19:08:00.000-08:00

Santa Dog and Calendar!

2010-01-03T08:50:00.000-08:00

This is the December art for Chester's 2010 Calendar. To see the whole thing, click below...

share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=0Act2bVi0aM2TmI

My "Staycation"

2009-08-28T09:30:00.000-07:00

Some people have You Tube videos of their labs climbing up pool slides and sliding in or diving for pool toys. We taught ours to float...

Some of the other activities this week involve entertaining around the pool, eating out, going to the Studio Movie Grill (Inglorious Bastards and District 9...loved them both) reading and writing.

I do think this is my best vacation ever!

Dog Days of Chester

2009-07-06T15:12:00.000-07:00

I know it's a cop-out to post pics instead of actually writing something, but he's just so darn CUTE! And you know what they say a picture's worth...

Long time, no blog

2009-04-07T11:27:00.001-07:00

What can I say, I've been busy. But here's a quick recap...

The bottom two pics are self-explanatory. The top one is my new entertainment center/built in for the master bedroom.

That's about it!

Hello Dolly?

2008-07-25T13:04:00.000-07:00

Just got back from a beach vacation to Galveston(Texas). As we began our perilous navigation through Houston traffic the computerized freeway signs greeted us with "Hurricane forming in the Gulf of Mexico. Please fill your gas tanks."

What kind of greeting is that?

It was hot and sunny...so, since there were plenty of other cars headed in the same direction as we were (due south) we continued. Besides, we would have lost our deposit on our condo. And what a condo it was! 2 FABULOUS views of the gulf, seagulls gulling, waves splashing and still not a cloud in the sky.

I suggested to my husband and son that they get their suits on quick while they still had a chance. I however laid in bed and read, occasionally glancing out onto my view...my idea of a vacation. Besides, that...I was tired after the six-hour drive.

Oh, did I mention we took the dog? I wasn't sure how that was going to work, but he was the best dog EVER! He just sat (and slept) in the back seat next to my son just like the brother he never had. Chester had no problem retiring to the condo bathroom for a little "alone" time while we went to eat at night. And the ocean was just one huge playground to him. He jumped the waves, swam, dug in the sand, napped...

The next day tropical storm Dolly became hurricane Dolly, but we didn't care. Through intermittent clouds and sun and a few showers we remained on the beach, virtually alone. At times I was reminded of Tom Hanks in Castaway.

The following day we decided to let mother nature have the beach as the waves were splashing over the seawall.

We said goodbye to our vacation destination (and goodbye, Dolly,) All the way back to Dallas the motor's vibrations lulled Chester back into a happy (sandy) nap.

Happy B-Day To Me

2008-07-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

Thought you'd like to see the cake my daughter made for my birthday. I'm a little late posting it. My birthday was June 11. But I thought it was still newsworthy and my daughter deserves some accolades for going to that much trouble. It was delicious, btw, with lemon cake and frosting. The little "gift packages" are Starbursts.

The King of the King of the Jungle

2008-06-29T08:50:00.000-07:00

Cousin Rudy's Weekend Visit

2008-05-19T20:00:00.000-07:00

It's Been A Looooong Winter

2008-05-08T09:00:00.000-07:00

But it's supposed to be in the nineties this weekend here in Big D. That means we can finally get in the pool...with the dog. We specifically chose this breed (labrador retriever) because they love the water.

Duck, Duck, Goose?

2008-03-22T22:16:00.000-07:00

The other morning when I was letting the dog out instead of the usual ducks floating around on the canal I could see a much larger bird perched on the fountain. (It doesn't start fountaining until 8 a.m.) Someone at work informed me it was a Canadian goose. Anyway, I thought he looked rather majestic sitting there as the sun rose over the houses (at least until 8 a.m.)

labrADORE!

2008-02-14T12:58:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day!

Shines Like The Top Of The Chrysler Building

2008-01-27T15:33:00.001-08:00

You know, I could tell you the long drawn out version of why, when my son totaled his car, I ended up getting a new car, but it's really only interesting to my immediate family who have already heard the story so to save you the agony I'll just show you my new car. Isn't it pretty?

It looks white in the pic but it's actually called Cool Vanilla...mmmmm

Ready For Take-Off

2008-01-04T08:34:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know this isn't a dog blog but he's just soooooo CUTE!

Have a Dog-gone Great Holiday!

2007-12-29T13:38:00.000-08:00

With love...

From my blog to yours

Nankin, You're It!

2007-12-19T20:41:00.000-08:00

John tagged me for a drabble. What is it? It's a story containing exactly 100 words, which is surprisingly short. My drabble is in the post below. Now I'm passing the drabble baton to Nankin47.blogspot.com

Perspective

2007-12-19T17:38:00.000-08:00

"Mom, come get me,” he slurs. “I had a wreck."

"Slow down," I tell myself, but my foot is heavy on the pedal.

His second DWI. I wonder how much bail will be and imagine driving to Huntsville. He doesn’t look good in orange.

I see him--blood on his shirt. Sitting next to him on the railing as they tow his car, I take his hand and we wait--for him to be arrested.

Suddenly, the police wave us on.

We can go? No breathalyzer? Not even a ticket?

His car is totaled, but I've NEVER felt more euphoric.

Who's the Boss?

2007-12-02T21:18:00.000-08:00

Chester is 4 months old now and we are enjoying every minute with him. Okay, so he is a little spoiled and has definitely made himself at home. Can you believe how big he's getting? Look at those feet!

Dog Tired

2007-11-25T21:42:00.000-08:00

Now that's what I call relaxed! Of course after all the tryptophan from the turkey on Thanksgiving, I was feeling about like Chester.

Hope everyone had a restful Thanksgiving...

Superdog

2007-11-03T11:58:00.000-07:00

Now that we have a pet Halloween has a whole new meaning. I wouldn't have made Chester wear his Superman costume but he actually seemed to enjoy it. And he really loved all the compliments he got from the trick or treaters who came to our door.

Sit, Chester, Sit!

2007-10-18T20:26:00.000-07:00

It's been almost 2 weeks since we brought Chester home and he's been an absolute joy. He's already housetrained, fetches toys when we throw them and sits on command...What a good boy! He also sleeps in our room in his sherpa bed all night long.

Having a puppy is infinitely easier than having a kid.

I wasn't sure what to do on Monday morning when I awoke to thunder, lightening and rain pouring down. I checked the puppy book cover to cover and nowhere did it mention rain in the housetraining chapter. I think inclement weather is worth at least a couple of paragraphs...don't you? I suppose we're going to have to invest in a golf umbrella, however Chester didn't look like he was particularly interested in "doing his business" in the icy cold rain. As a matter of fact, he looked up at me like I was insane when I suggested he might like to go in the backyard without me.

I put papers down in the laundry room and he just played with them. Silly puppy. Fortunately the weather cleared before we had any major accidents. Here he is "sitting" in his favorite chair:

How Much is that Doggie in the Photo...

2007-10-08T20:28:00.000-07:00

Ok...so...we got a dog. He's a yellow lab puppy, only 10 weeks old and we LOVE him!!! He is sooooooooooooo cute! Yes, we know, there are pitfalls to having a puppy. But watching him run uncoordinated with those big feet of his is worth it. This is the photo that was in the online ad. Many, many MANY more to come...

Chester is the yellow one, shown here with his chocolate brothers.

Tooty-fruity, oh Rudy!

2007-10-04T20:14:00.000-07:00

We "babysat" my daughter's boyfriend's dog this weekend while they went out of town and now we miss him (the dog, not the boyfriend). So we're thinking about getting a dog of our own. The irony is we never had any animals around the house because my daughter is allergic to them. Anyway, here are some pics of Rudy, the yellow lab who's stolen our hearts.

TA DA!

2007-08-15T07:19:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm finally posting pictures of my new bath. I had planned to write about the process but the whole thing was such a disaster I couldn't bring myself to put it into words. Suffice it to say, it took one contractor to really screw it up and another great and saintly one to fix it. We are still waiting for the shower glass to be installed. Anyway, without any further ado:

Houston, We Have Paint

2007-06-03T22:23:00.000-07:00

The End is Near?

2007-05-29T20:41:00.000-07:00

That's been the promise now for the last several weeks on our bathroom remodel...I'll believe it when I see it.

The Madhatter's Teaparty

2007-05-23T20:12:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I gave one of my best friend's daughters a wedding shower. I decided to make it an outdoor event and one of the suggested themes I found online was the teaparty from Alice in Wonderland.

It turned out to be really fun, but the best part was my hare-brained scheme to have my husband play the part of Agador Spartacus from the movie "The Birdcage". If you recall, Agador is the Guatamalan man-servant who falls down when he wears shoes. I figured if I was going to enjoy my outdoor teaparty I needed a waiter to fill up those tiny teacups. He also came in handy fishing the croquet ball out of the pool. Don't even ask what I had to promise to get him to do it...but isn't he cute!

The weather was perfect! Not too hot and not too windy.

We had rose-bouquet plates and napkins, pink iridescent tablecloths and genuine china teacups and saucers. My daughter made the Madhatter cake

Here's the bride-to-be in her wedding veil we made from feathers, netting and funny foam.

The winner of the Most Outrageously Mad Hat trophy

What would a Wonderland theme be without a game of croquet? We even had little pink flamingos on the course. The partygoers who "forgot" their hat were provided tiny tiaras to wear.

Another Bathroom Update

2007-05-22T03:12:00.000-07:00

I'm going to spare you the long and boring story of dealing with contractors and subcontractors. Suffice it to say it's been my experience after three bathroom remodels that they must belong to some sort of Compulsive Liars Association and need to join E.A. (Excuses Anonymous). The one-week project as promised has turned into more like 4 weeks and counting...

Finally we got some tilework done. The closet also got tiled because when they pulled the toilet, the valve leaked and ruined the carpet in there. They also broke the commode so we're getting a new one.

The red stuff is called red guard and it's supposed to protect against water damage or mold or something like that...however right now it looks like a murder scene. I'm tempted to write redrum on the mirror.

Another "During" Pic

2007-05-11T20:57:00.000-07:00

The remodel is coming along...slowly but surely. Right now the shower bench looks like a cardboard box. The small rectangle to the upper left is a niche...which is a fancy word for a place to put stuff like shampoo and conditioner. Maybe next week we'll finally get to the good stuff like tile and fixtures.

Long Time No Blog

2007-05-05T22:14:00.000-07:00

I know, but I've been busy. With what, you ask? We've begun remodelling our master bathroom, we attended my cousin's son's wedding, we had out of town guests, we heated the pool for a swim party, we weathered a storm that was so bad it lifted a glassed top patio table and threw it into the pool, breaking the top into a zillion pieces...

Anyway, it wasn't that the bath was in bad shape or even out of date. The problem was the small shower with the nonadjustable shower head. The people who lived here before us must have been tall. At 5'3" the shower spray hit me directly in the face. After a year of that I had had enough. So we called the contractor and began the task of removing the extremely small shower that spit in my face and replacing it with a linen closet/hamper and removing the large garden tub which had become an extremely expensive laundry hamper and replacing it with a luxuriously large shower. See before and during pictures below:

The downside: lots of cement dust and climbing the stairs every morning to shower.
The upside: it's fun to pick out tile and paint.
The cliche: to make an omlette you have to break some eggs.

A Good Old Fashioned Easter

2007-04-07T09:02:00.000-07:00

Nothing says Christ has risen like alcohol, tobacco and a cock fight!

Writer's Workshop Today...

2007-03-30T16:19:00.000-07:00

...from 8:30 to 4:30 with an hour for lunch. That's a long time to engage the brain for someone who hasn't been in school since, uh, hot pants were hot.

But I think some of it sank in. It was about Empowering Characters' Emotions and we had to bring our first three chapters and 5 highlighter markers. Let's see if I can remember. Yellow for internalization, blue for dialog, green for description, orange for tension and the elusive pink for emotion. Red underline for everything else. Then we marked up our chapters. What we hoped for was a rainbow effect in our writing...which is what mine was...even some smatterings of pink...phew!

If you're interested, our speaker Margie Lawson is starting an online workshop April 2.

Now I'm all jazzed to start something new. The question is what.

DSL and the new Blogger

2007-03-21T20:42:00.000-07:00

It's a big week for me. I was the last living soul on dial up and evidently the last one left on old blogger because they MADE me sign up for the new one tonight. I must admit it was easy...especially with the new DSL. Ordinarily I embrace change but sometimes being the last one on the bandwagon means all the kinks have been worked out beforehand. Hope that's true this time.

Writing Wreport:

I had a request from a NY agent for the first 100 pages of For Richer or Repo today! Also I've started a final draft of my very first novel (paranormal romance) which according to some things I've read lately is very hot right now. CurvyKathy31: Confessions of a Chat Addict is with an E-publisher. Since it's about internet dating I figure an e-publisher would be fitting. Certainly not my first choice but that book is rapidly becoming obsolete...and if it does well online then they publish it for real.

Blog Block

2007-03-18T22:53:00.000-07:00

It's similar to writer's block...only worse. Because it's a symptom of a much more serious malady--BLS (Boring Life Syndrome). I used to have lots to write about...and when I didn't have anything urgent on my mind I could always put up a pic of my pool...lol.

It's not that I'm not happy. (Sorry, John for the double negative.) Things are going along swimmingly. But let's face it. When all the plates are spinning as they should that makes for pretty boring blog posts. Maybe I should bring back Freaky Fridays. Boy, was I popular then!

Snowy View From An Upstairs Window

2007-02-04T21:34:00.000-08:00

Okay. It was only a light blanket and it barely lasted a day, but it's still pretty cool for a native Texan (pardon the pun.) We've had an unusual amount of the white stuff this year and us Texans are always fascinated by it. Saturday morning it was so cold the ducks in the canal were surprised to find the surface had actually frozen over. They were making sudden U-turns upon landing to keep from skidding across it. A few who didn't realize in time found themselves doing some figure skating moves deserving of 10s from every judge. Fortunately the freeze guard on our pool seems to be in excelent working order.

Enough about the weather! I didn't watch the Superbowl but I did catch half-time. I thought Purple Rain was very appropriate considering it was pouring down rain (oops...more weather talk...sorry). But what was that on the "artist formerly known as Prince's" head?

Wintery Mix

2007-01-21T22:18:00.000-08:00

After a whole week of overcast days, iffy road conditions and tons of rain, sleet and ice, it was bright and sunny today...thank goodnesss! I really do start to wither if we have too many consecutive days of gray.

Fortunately I had my monthly writer's club today which inspired to me add five pages to my work in progress.

Things have finally slowed down at work and I'm looking forward to getting on with my water aerobics classes.

One final thought before I turn in for the night. Who came up with the term "wintery mix"? The media uses it all the time now to describe weather conditions. Don't they realize "Ice and Snow" has fewer syllables?

I'm ready for a summery mix!

Out w/Old...In w/New

2007-01-07T21:40:00.000-08:00

The tree's been de-balled, the lights have been un-strung and everything festive's been boxed and tucked neatly up in the attic. Time for a new year and new resolutions. The last couple of years have been pretty stressful for reasons I won't go into now. So I want this to be a year for me...I hope it doesn't sound too selfish. I'm really just speaking in a health-related capacity.

Tomorrow, along with 2 co-workers, we are joining a water aerobics class two nights a week. I've done water aerobics before and it's really fun and easy and not only gets your heart rate up and burns calories but it's very low impact and if you do ever break a sweat you don't really notice. The hardest thing about it is pulling on that tight Lycra suit. And the additional "hair" management I don't usually worry about in the winter.

We'll see how it goes.

On another note...I'm off this week. This is payback for the week I worked between Christmas and New Years. I don't really have any plans, but I do hope to write some.

One final thing. About Saturday night. I just want to let all the neighbors know in case they were wondering that my husband wasn't yelling those horrible obscenities at me...it was at the TV...and more specifically at the Dallas Cowboys.

Remember This SNL Classic?

2007-01-02T21:20:00.000-08:00

From the Saturday Night Live Transcripts:

Tom Brokaw Pre-Tapes

Tom Brokaw: Okay, who are we up to?

Voice of Producer: Uh.. we're still on Presidents. Gerald Ford.

Tom Brokaw: Gerald Ford? Well, he's in good shape..

Voice of Producer: Just covering our bases, Tom. You never know..

Tom Brokaw: Alright, alright.. [ graphic of Gerald Ford, "1913-1996" appears over Tom's left shoulder ] "Gerald Ford dead today at the age of 83."

Voice of Producer: Okay, good. And, one for next year.

Tom Brokaw: Alright.. [ graphic of Gerald Ford, "1913-1997" ] "Gerald Ford dead today, at age 84."

Voice of Producer: Uh.. a little sadder.

Tom Brokaw: Alright. [ sad ] "Gerald Ford dead today.. at age 84.."

Voice of Producer: That was good. Good.

Tom Brokaw: Okay, what now?

Voice of Producer: Now let's do one for if he's shot.

Tom Brokaw: Well, what are the chances of that?

Voice of Producer: We're just covering contingencies.

Tom Brokaw: I mean, it just seems that Gerald Ford..

Voice of Producer: Look - you're the one who wants to spend the whole winter in Barbados, okay? Now, we gotta be ready with something, just in case. Alright, Tom?

Tom Brokaw: Alright, alright.. [ graphic of Gerald Ford, "1913-1996" ] "Gerald Ford shot dead today, at age 83."

Voice of Producer: Uh.. add the word "senseless".

Tom Brokaw: Alright. "Gerald Ford shot dead today, at the senseless age of 83."

Voice of Producer: Um.. uh..

Tom Brokaw: Alright, alright.. "Gerald Ford shot senselessly dead, at the age of 83."

Voice of Producer: Good, good.. Okay, now suicide.

Tom Brokaw: What?!

Voice of Producer: Just read it!

Tom Brokaw: Alright. "Gerald Ford dead today, after jupming out of an office building, senselessly."

Voice of Producer: That's a nice touch. Okay, moving on.

Tom Brokaw: Okay. "Gerald Ford dead today, from an overdose of crack cocaine."

Voice of Producer: Good, good.. Next.

Tom Brokaw: Alright. [ graphic of Gerald Ford and a commuter plane ] "Stunning news from Michigan, as former President Gerald Ford was chopped into little bits by the propeller of a commuter plane."

Voice of Producer: Good. One take.

Tom Brokaw: Alright, we got it?

Voice of Producer: No. We've got "eaten by wolves".

Tom Brokaw: What? Now, come on!

Voice of Producer: Just read it!

Tom Brokaw: Gerald Ford isn't gonna be eaten by wolves!

Voice of Producer: Taft was.

Tom Brokaw: Really? Taft?

Voice of Producer: Uh.. yeah.

Tom Brokaw: Alright, alright.. [ graphic of Ford surrounded by a pair of wolves ] "Tragedy today, as former President Gerald Ford was eaten by wolves. He was delicious." Now.. now, that's just superfluous, you know?

Voice of Producer: It's a former President, Tom. What do you say - he's not delicious?

Tom Brokaw: Alright, fine.. what's next?

Voice of Producer: The double story.

Tom Brokaw: Alright. [ graphic of Ford and map of France ] "A fireball destroyed France today, and Gerald Ford is dead." Now, what are the odds of that?

Voice of Producer: Fine. We'll get Stone Phillips to do it. You know, I'm sure Stone Phillips would be thrilled to break a story like that!

Tom Brokaw: Alright. Let's keep moving.. [ graphic of Ford and the corpse of Richard Nixon ] "Stunning news from Yorba Linda today, as Richard Nixon's corpse climbed out of his grave and strangled Gerald For to death."

Voice of Producer: Excellent.

Tom Brokaw: Alright. [ graphic of Ford and circus lion ] "Gerald Ford was mauled senselessly by a circus lion in a convenience store."

Voice of Producer: Good. Next.

Tom Brokaw: Alright. "Gerald Ford is dead today, and I'm gay." Now, wait a minute!

Voice of Producer: What? That'd be a huge story - Ford dying, and you coming out!

Tom Brokaw: But I'm not gay!

Voice of Producer: Today you're not gay, you know.. but then one day you wake up, you like men, and Gerald Ford dies, and we're screwed. Everyone's hearing about it from Dan Rather!

Tom Brokaw: Alright, alright.. what's this for?

[ graphic of Gerald Ford and the Zimbabwee flag appears ]

Voice of Producer: Alright, this one's for if we're invaded by Zimbabwee.

Tom Brokaw: Would I still be the anchor if Zimbabwee invaded us?

Voice of Producer: Yeah.. if you break the Gerald Ford story, you will..

Tom Brokaw: Alright. "Hola bambe, hungala dimba Gerald Ford.. *click* *click* *click* *click* ..hola bambe, allah bumba bubba hulla humba hey."

Voice of Producer: Very nice. Very nice. A little sadder, please.

Tom Brokaw: Alright, alright.. [ sadly ] "Hola bambe, hungala dimba Gerald Ford.. *click* *click* ..hola bambe.."

[ fade ]

Our 12 Days of Christmas

2006-12-31T12:52:00.000-08:00

12 gold placesettings

11 mimosas
10 people eating

9 pots a boiling
8 cups of eggnog
7 ducks a swimming
6 sticks of butter
5 golden hours of sleep
4 smiling faces

3 tired cooks
2 much food
And presents for the Christmas Tree

O'Donnell VS The Donald

2006-12-21T20:42:00.000-08:00

I think everyone is missing the point about this war of the words between Rosie O'Donnell and Donald Trump.

Last week as owner of the Miss USA pageant, Trump gave Miss USA a second chance after she was caught drinking under age. For those of you who missed it, the controversy went something like this...

Rosie on The View: Trump "left his first wife -- had an affair. Left the second wife -- had an affair. But he's the moral compass for 20-year-olds in America? Donald, sit and spin, my friend."

Then she flipped her hair over to mock his famous comb-over hairstyle.

Donald retorted during several interviews with: "Rosie's a loser. A real loser. I look forward to taking lots of money from my nice fat little Rosie. What moral compass does she have? I mean just take a look at her, take a look at that face. I mean, can you imagine her poor girlfriend having to kiss that every night? You can have her. You'd better be careful or I'll send one of my friends to take your girlfriend! I imagine it would be pretty easy to take her girlfriend away, considering how Rosie looks."

He also called her a "fat slob" and "despicable."

Okay, now it's my turn.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Rose O'Donnell a comediene and a talk show host? Like...um...Jay Leno, David Letterman and Conan O'Brien? They've certainly made disparaging remarks about EVERYONE including The President and Donald Trump in the name of comedy. But Trump didn't start discussing THEIR appearance.

I mean, come on! Jay Leno has a chin like The Man in the Moon and Letterman is an Alfred J. Newman look alike. O'Brien's Night of the Living Giant Red-Head appearance is downright spooky. But did Trump talk about how ugly they are and threaten to sleep with their wives when they made jokes about him?

No he didn't.

So why is it okay to talk about Rosie's appearance? Because she's a woman? Because she's a lesbian? Because she's not Miss USA?

A couple of weeks ago Rosie was accused of perpetuating racism and descimination when she told a joke using a Chinese accent...even though she was talking about people in China. Outrage in the Asian-American community against O'Donnell has been growing, and a New York city councilman explained that it is not a trivial matter.

Give me a break, Mr. councilman. What about the people like Donald Trump who are perpetuating the last acceptable descrimination against obesity.

Why isn't anyone (besides me) outraged about that?

The Difference Between Men & Women

2006-12-13T20:52:00.000-08:00

First of all, I want to thank my husband for being so wonderful. He truly "completes" me...is the yin to my yang...the tomato to my tomahto. What brings on this gush of admiration? He can hang drapes, Christmas lights and other ladder climbing and tool toting activities that I can't do.

And this time (probably for the first time) we hung the drapes without any conflict. He just did it, to my specifications and left me feeling oh-so-appreciative.

I know he doesn't really like doing these things, especially when he doesn't understand why. Men tend to be a little more utilitarian than women. "Because it will look good" doesn't rate as a good enough reason to climb the ladder.

The house we live in now has plantation shutters in almost every room so all of the windows light-adjusting, energy efficiency and privacy issues have already been solved. But there's nothing like a dash of color, a swath of texture and some elaborate embellishment to enrich the look of a window, and ultimately the entire room.

But (as he pointed out) drapes tend to interfere with the movement of the plantation shutters, which are basically hinged doors over the windows. So I was happy to find a new trend in window coverings which allows me to add the color and texture to my windows without getting in the way of the shutters. Unfortunately this particular style renders the drapes completely useless (except for the uses I already mentioned.)

I tried to explain the whole concept of the dining room drapes before I bought them but it was no use. I finally convinced him to just trust me. Here's what happened.

BEFORE

DURING

AFTER

He agreed with me that the window looks better. Now that I think about it...he's the plantation shutter and I'm decorative drapes. We make a great pair!

Shrink-wrapped Dessert

2006-12-10T16:35:00.000-08:00

Snow and Other Weird Things

2006-11-30T14:15:00.000-08:00

Right now I'm looking out my home office window at snow. To some of you this may seem uneventful, but for someone who lives in North Texas, this is pretty freakin' eventful! They let us go home early from work as any kind of frozen precipitation brings this little ol' metropolitain area to a complete and utter standstill. So I thought it would be a good time for me and my can of cheddar Pringles to answer John's meme: 6 things that make you weird.

1. I don't think this is really werid but it is my biggest flaw. I can't make it anywhere on time no matter how hard I try. Some people think this is due to laziness, a disrespect for other people or lack of organization. I don't see it that way. I just think I'm afflicted with a case of O.A.O. (overly active optimism.)

2. I love to eat but I hate to cook. Part of this is because I don't like to participate in an activity that takes longer to prepare for than to enjoy. Do you think golfers would enjoy playing a round if it took 4 hours to put your clubs in the car and drive to the course and you only got to play for an hour? I think not. The other part is that I'm surrounded by picky eaters who took the joy and creativity out of cooking a long time ago.

3. I'm a writer. I think that makes me inherently weird. You would understand this if you've ever seen the people who attend a writing conference (especially romance, sci-fi and horror). I like to think that I don't really fit in with those groups of unattractive recluses, but I know it's probably true.

4. (This is harder that I thought. Maybe I'm not that weird after all.) I'm one of those people who drive in the left lane on the highway and force everyone who insists on driving faster than 10 miles over the speed limit to pass me on the right . Some might say this is a flagrant disrespect for tailgaters and speed demons. I say it's simple geometry. The closest distance between two points is a straight line.

5. I'm happy to be an only child. No one has ever told me a sibling story that moved me enough to wish I had one. Most of their tales make me THANK GOD I don't.

6. This New Year's Eve I will have been married for 30...count them THIRTY years. In this day and age that's pretty darn weird. There are several tips I would like to give all the newlyweds. Even if you don't go to bed at the same time, always tuck the other one in with a glass of ice water and some kisses and hugs. If you have separate TV rooms, visit each other during the commercials. And finally, never make enough of a combined income to support two households. Lack of funds is the tie that binds.

I Went For The Gold

2006-11-28T21:20:00.000-08:00

I know everyone's been anxiously waiting for the big napkin and napkin ring reveal...

I decided with all the burgundy, the napkin needed to be gold...and not just mustard gold like a Century 21 Realtor jacket. I mean METALLIC gold, which it turns out is pretty easy to find. I decided to save a few dollars and make the napkin rings out of some burgundy and metallic gold ribbon I used on the centerpiece. Besides, I figure a napkin ring is kinda like expensive lingerie...it's only on for a second.

Just FYI, Linens and Things was more expensive than Pier 1...who woulda thought?

Stay tuned for what I like to call "The ultimate test of a marriage": hanging drapes.

To Brunch or Not To Brunch...

2006-11-22T21:49:00.000-08:00

Normally on Christmas Day we (the four of us and my parents) make reservations at a nice restaurant. But it can be quite expensive. So this year, since we moved into the new house, I decided to re-create the holiday brunch at home. And with the money we saved I figured I could get new china, and flatware and table linens.
And a centerpiece.
And new drapes.
Okay, it would probably have been cheaper to go out.

Dining room looking like a home magazine centerfold? Priceless.

This weekend I'll be searching for just the right napkins and holiday motif napkin rings.

More as the story develops...

Up, Up and Away...

2006-11-18T21:13:00.000-08:00

You gotta love Texas when it's in the mid seventies in the middle of November. What a gorgeous day...full of SHOPPING! When we got home from the mall some hot air balloons were traveling right over the house...

1 state, 2 state, red state, blue state

2006-11-10T20:18:00.000-08:00

I don't study politics at all, so therefore I don't vote. I figure I'll let the people who are educated on the subjects decide. And as a fair trade, I don't complain about the decisions our government makes. But I do have to say I like the color coordinated thing going on these days. I'd much rather see my candidates name in red rather than have an elephant beside him...or much worse...a donkey! So, good job whoever came up with that.

On another random note, I got to take one of my flexible Fridays today. That's where my company lets me leave work at 1 on Friday providing I've put in the extra hours the rest of the week. It was a beautiful day today, but as I drove home I was feeling a bit of guilt. My "plan" for my precious 4 hours of free time was to watch Ellen and take a nap. Couldn't I possibly come up with something more constructive with my time? The answer is...no. Ellen makes me laugh and the sound of water splashing from the fountain outside my windows makes me sleepy. In case you're new...here's a pic of the view.

And finally, today I spent some time looking for a new agent. There's some scuttlebutt on one of my writer's e-mail loops about how having a bad agent can actually be worse for your career than being put in the bottom of the slushpile. A really bad agent can land you in the trash. The politics involved in getting published wears me down sometimes. But then I write a new scene I'm really proud of and I feel better. It amazes me the amount of agents who don't accept e-mail queries. Do I really want someone representing me who still does business through snail mail? I don't know the answer to that question yet.

Thanksgiving in June

2006-11-05T22:33:00.000-08:00

Jeez, am I glad October's over. What with both of my kids' birthdays, PACE, Halloween and that stupid time change, I'm exhausted. And where does that leave me? Staring straight down the barrel of the holidays. I hate that as I've grown older all the special occasions have turned into things to "get through" as painlessly as possible. But that's the way I feel about it...and my family isn't even all that dysfunctional.

I would like to start a campaign right here and now to offically move Thanksgiving to...uh...how about June. I only see my relatives at Thanksgiving and Christmas so I'd like to spread it out a little bit more. After we visit at Thanksgiving that doesn't give us much to talk about at Christmas. Moving it would also give a much needed summertime boost to the cranberry and turkey farmers. The retailers certainly don't give Thanksgiving any attention where it is...and the weather in June would be much better for the Macy's parade.

Anyway, here are some pics from my daughter and her boyfriend's Halloween party.

My daughter and her boyfriend as Mario and Princess Peach from the Mario Bros. videogame

My son, the grim reaper, and his father, Frank

There's No Business Like it

2006-10-27T20:19:00.000-07:00

The reviews are in and Scary PACE was "the best one yet" and the "funniest one ever." For some reason this year there was an excitement in the air all over our building...an anticipation I've never seen before. I had people calling from other departments asking if they could "crash" the show.

It was a coincident that Scary PACE was actually our thirteenth year. This is the first time we've held the annual awards show in October. Each year it's a little later in the year so eventually I suppose we'll skip a year kind of like a leap year skips a day to keep up.

Anyway, it was a lot of work but worth every minute. The set was creepy and cool with a miniature graveyard including fencing and a huge flourescent moon hanging above it. There were gothic chairs for the presenters (who were in full costume) to sit in (PVC pipe and black satin over regular chairs). And the EMCEES Vampire and Vampira had a deliciously gruesome script full of puns guaranteed to make you groan about drinking bloody marys and longnecks and thinking outside the box.

The fog machine added to the "graveyard" feel of the stage, unfortunately, it also made taking pictures almost impossible (unless you like pictures of smoke).

We had an opening number to Thriller with faceless zombie dancers. After it was over and to everyone's surprise, one of the dancers went to the podium and took off his mask revealing the president of our division. (Insert hysterical laughter here)

The rest of the show included the awards and various and sundry videos which depicted in GREAT detail things such as unfortunate associates being killed by copy machines and shark-like mail carts.

Here's a list of the movies and TV shows we lampooned (taking a deep breath): Jaws, Shining, Twilight Zone, Friday the 13th, Exorcist, Hellraiser, Phantom of the Opera, Halloween, Alfred Hitchcock, The Ring, Addams Family, Psycho, Motel Hell, Nightmare on Elm Street, Creature from the Black Lagoon, Dracula, Young Frankenstein, Frankestein, The Mummy, The Hunchback, Scary Movie I and II.

One of my favorite parts of the show was how we handed out the awards. We had a (petite) woman lying in a cardboard coffin in front of the podium. You couldn't tell she was real until the first award recipient was handed the trophy she held like a lily on her chest. After each award she would descretely replace it with another one that was tucked beside her in the casket. Every time her pale, thin hand reached out of the coffin with another trophy...we got another huge laugh. Our brave committee member who volunteered for coffin duty spent the entire hour and a half flat on her back with her eyes closed. (She'll have to watch the show when it comes out on video.)

Another "new wrinkle" this year was that the invitations were attached to plastic see-through masks that you were instructed to decorate and wear as your key to enter the show. Earlier in the day everyone brought their masks to a designated room for judging. Then they took digital pictures of the top three scariest, funniest and most original masks. Before the audience entered the ballroom they voted on their favorite in each category. Then at the end of the show we gave $25 gift cards to the winners.

And speaking of winners...my mask with hot-glued candy corn, a baby bottle in it's mouth and a tag that said

"Children of the Candy Corn"
took first place in the funniest category. For some reason this award far outshined the $100 gift card and trophy I received for Best Editorial Copy.

Anyway, a good time was had by all, but I'm glad it's over for another year...and that it's Friday.

Don't Bother Me While I'm WORKING!

2006-10-17T21:24:00.000-07:00

PACE PACE PACE
Busy, busy, busy,
Scary PACE (aptly named)
Problems. Losing sleep.
The home stretch.
Is it over yet?
Can't wait.
5-6-7-8
And the winner is...

BTW, I started a new manuscript. It's a lot easier to start one than to finish it.

: )

Instant Transportation

2006-10-01T20:51:00.000-07:00

I think music more than anything else has the power to transport me to another place and time, whether I want to go there or not.

A few bars of Sinatra's Strangers in the Night and I'm suddenly six years old watching my parents slow dance. Santana's Black Magic Woman takes me to about 12 years old sitting outside at night with the neighborhood kids. Chicago's Color My World puts me right in the arms of my first serious boyfriend at the Jr. High Band Dance. Anything from K.C. and the Sunshine band and I'm doing the bump on the lighted disco dance floor with my fiance (we'll be married 30 years this New Year's Eve).

Michael Jackson's I'm Bad conjures up images of my daughter's 5th birthday when we had an MJ look-a-like perform. Walk Like An Egyptian actually brings tears to my eyes as I remember my 3-year-old-son doing the Egyptian dance to get his mother's attention. Any techno music takes me to the little league football field, the parade down Beltline, or the middle of the UNT Coliseum where my competitive drill team performed. Go Charger Powerline!

The soundtrack from Amageddon reminds me of when my daughter taught me how to do this new thing on AOL called "chatting."

I guess someday the music I'm listening to now (Rascal Flatt's Bless The Broken Road) will take me back to blogging this post for you.

What are you listening to right now?

Scary PACE

2006-09-25T21:06:00.000-07:00

PACE stands for Publishing and Advertising Creative Excellence. It's an awards show (a mix of Saturday Night Live-esque skits and videos and Oscar-style awards) I've been involved with at work for the past 13 years and this year I'm the chairman. Since the show is Oct. 26 the committee thought it would be fitting to have a "scary" theme.

This week we're shooting video which is very time consuming and not nearly as fun as it sounds, but I'm always amazed at the "talent" that surfaces when someone yells "action." I'm also in charge of choreographing the opening number which includes dressing up like zombies and dancing to

It's gonna be fun but there's a lot of work to be done between now and then. I'll keep you posted.

Happy 80th, Dad

2006-09-17T20:15:00.000-07:00

Friends and family got together last week at our favorite (centrally located) restaurant to celebrate my Dad's birthday. It turned out to be a lot of fun even though it was on a school night.

This weekend I had houseguests from Waco, my best friend and her daughter and friend. It was a wonderful weekend of shopping, cooking out and hot-tubbing (too cool for the pool). We also finally tried out the fire pit which is probably the closest I'll be getting to camping out. We roasted marshmallows around our terracotta and wrought iron pit and sang one line of Kumbaya for effect.

There's just nothing better than charred marshmallows on a wire hanger, especially from the comfort of your own back yard. (Sorry, no pics. I'll do better next time.)

Krikey!

2006-09-04T21:11:00.000-07:00

Steve Irwin, the Discovery Channel's crocodile hunter died today. No, not by a gator, but by a stingray off the coast of Australia.

For some reason it gives me comfort that he wasn't bitten by the toothy fellows who made him famous. And they say he died doing what he loved...wrangling deadly animals.

We will all miss you, Steve.

Oh! What a feeling...

2006-09-03T19:10:00.000-07:00

...to not have a WIP. (For you non-writers that stands for work in progress.)

On one hand it feels wonderful to be completely free of obligations to it. For the first time in a long time I don't feel guilty writing a blog post.

On the other, these ideas keep calling to me. "Write me! No, write me!"

It's a big decision what the next subject matter should be--a committment to spend the next year or so pouring your soul into something that may or may not see the light of day (except for your critique group, your Mom and close friends.)

Too bad there's not an online service to hook you up with your next perfect WIP. Let's see. They could call it E-Genre.com. or Love at first Write.

On another note I just finished hosting the final pool party of the season. It was my mother-in-law's birthday. As luck would have it, the wind was so blustery and cool no one got in the pool. Oh well, I've discovered old people really don't like to put on their suits anyway. Here are some pics:

Spoiled Rotten

2006-08-27T20:54:00.000-07:00

This is the first weekend in a very LONG time I haven't had to write and/or host a party. It was soooooooooo nice. I forgot what it was like to actually have a weekend.

One book-related thing. Because friends and family have been bugging me, I took a clean manuscript along with a temporary cover I designed to Kinko's and had some copies bound into books to pass around. While I was at the Kinko's counter a guy standing next to me (early 30's with his girlfriend) asked if I'd written it and said that judging by the cover he'd like to read it. I didn't bother to tell him he wasn't exactly my target market, but I thanked him anyway. I wasn't sure if it was the title or the picture of the Porsche that piqued his interest...probably the Porsche.

Anyway, it was exciting picking up copies of my book, even if I commissioned the printing myself. Now I'll be waiting for the first reviews, even though a critique from your Mom doesn't really count.

Party Pic!

2006-08-21T19:51:00.000-07:00

It was a success. We had almost 30 people I work with and their spouses, kids or significant others. My daughter acted as caterer so we had lots of good food. And I couldn't have asked for better weather (well, okay, it was in the hundreds. but that's good for a swim party.) The fountain was splashing, the lions were spitting and the waterfalls were falling. With all that water it really is hard to believe there's a drought going on.

P.S. You'll note my mom wearing her trademark shower hat (a swim cap would smush her up-do.) She's one of those throwbacks who gets her hair done at the beauty parlor once a week.

Is No News Really Good News...

2006-08-18T17:22:00.000-07:00

Evidently, typing "The End" does not a novel make. I forgot about the little details like a final draft, which, if you've ever written a novel, is never REALLY final.

BUT, after several weeks of editing, she's as done as she'll ever be...and I mean done as in forwarded to the editor by way of my agent.

I forgot how much FUN this part is. Nothing like your heart needing a jump start with the paddles every time the phone rings or the e-mail dings.

But wait...everyone in New York is in the Hamptons this time of year, right?

And do I really want to get the phone call that will crush my hopes? At least while I was writing the thing, hope was my constant companion. Now I'm stuck with the twins, dread and self-doubt.

I miss hope.

The only way to get my best friend back is to start another book. Fortunately I have three good ideas. I'll just take the weekend off to host another pool party or two and then get started...

THE END!!!!!

2006-08-01T17:30:00.000-07:00

That's right. At 12:09 Monday morning I typed the words every writer yearns for. This is my 4th completed manuscript but I think the thrill is still the same.

Spoiled Rotten is 90,000 plus words of chicklit-arama. (Is that a category?) I guess if I had to narrow it down it's a Chick Lit Mystery. You could also categorize it as a romance that breaks ALL the rules.

AND...the best part is I have an editor from a big-time New York publisher who wants it e-mailed to her ASAP.

The bad news? It still needs some polishing.

That's why I've got to run!

No Joke About Spewing Lions...

2006-07-23T21:00:00.000-07:00

Here they are...finally!

Still busy trying to finish the book. I thought I might finish this weekend...but I had to have another pool party. More pics to come. Going to write another scene now! Later...

At Last!

2006-07-01T10:08:00.000-07:00

We've been swimming since Thursday and it's WONDERFUL! We're still missing a few minor details (like the spewing lions heads) but now that there's water in it I can't complain.

Have a wonderful 4th of July weekend and stay cool!

Houston, We Have Water!

2006-06-26T21:04:00.001-07:00

After a flury of activity last week including equipment installation, deck preparation and inspection, today they plastered the pool. It's bright white until they put the water in which they do right away. The water helps cure the plaster and keep it smooth.

When they put the water in it looks blue...an aqua blue while there's marble dust in the water.

I guess that's what plaster is made out of. It's supposed to take 24 hours to fill the pool. While the plaster is curing we have to be very careful with it. But by Friday we can swim!!! Now that it's finally here I can't believe it.

A Short Post To Say Hey!

2006-06-14T20:30:00.000-07:00

I know it's been a while, but I feel I should spend every ounce of my creative energy on my manuscript since I have an agent and an editor waiting on me to finish it. And I'm soooooo close...

The only action we've had on the pool is clean up and irrigation repair--two of the steps to building the pool that don't really show up well in a picture. There's been NO rain. We're still in stage 3 so we're hoping they put the plaster in soon (ie: before stage 4). We have had some nice evenings sitting out on our lovely deck and gazing into the empty hole, but it sure would be nice to actually get in it before summer's over.

I'm taking a flexible Friday this week so that should give me some bonus writing time. Last weekend I celebrated a milestone birthday. (I'm not going to say which one, but when I tell people they can't believe it because I look so young--they wouldn't lie about a thing like that, would they?) And of course this weekend is Father's Day.

But like I always say, It's always somethin'

POOL: Day Thirty-Five

2006-06-05T19:34:00.000-07:00

Nothing new to report. We're still waiting for the clean-up crew. We're meeting with the landscaper tomorrow to see what plans he's drawn up for us. I'm really looking forward to it--I feel like I'm on one of those landscaping shows on HGTV! One of the things we wanted him to price for us was a putting green. While I was researching artificial turf online I found this picture and thought it was too cute. (I know I have some golfers who read this so this one's for you.)

In case you can't tell that's about 3 feet of snow they had to shovel off of their artificial turf putting green. Now that's what I call golf nuts.

POOL: Day Thirty-One

2006-05-31T21:25:00.000-07:00

The stone people were back today building the deck steps...

The clean-up crew will be out next...not sure when.

Still no rain.

POOL: Day Twenty-Six

2006-05-27T20:04:00.000-07:00

They didn't end up pouring the deck until Friday, something about confusion in scheduling. Anyway, it was just in time for Memorial Day Weekend so we can entertain outside again. We can't believe how huge the deck is. We'll have to buy more patio furniture to fill it up!

There is one small problem. We're having a drought here and we're at stage 3 in our community, which means we can only water on trash day. I went online to the city website to see what stage 4 means...you guessed it...you can't fill your pool. Pray for rain!!!!

Writing News!
I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. One more chapter to go. But tying up all those loose ends is hard work.

POOL: Day Twenty-Two

2006-05-22T21:02:00.000-07:00

Today was deck layout. Tomorrow the city inspects it and Wednesday they pour it.

Stop And Smell The Fireworks

2006-05-20T20:09:00.000-07:00

On the way back from having mexican food with my parents tonight they were shooting fireworks for the minor league baseball game. The stadium is near our home. We pulled over in a deserted parking lot and watched as bombs burst in air directly over our heads. We could actually see where the rockets red glare originated. Pretty cool and as spectacular as any 4th of July show. Wish I'd had my camera. It looked something like this only closer and A LOT louder:

Our little private fireworks show was so unexpected and so spur of the moment I guess you could say it was spontaneous combustion.

: )

POOl: Day Nineteen

2006-05-19T21:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday they installed the long plumbing and today they did the electrical work. There's no pic to post because there's nothing new to see...except they tore up our yard even more. The next thing to look forward to is the layout and pouring of the deck, which is scheduled to begin Monday. I can't wait!

I've taken pictures along the way of my husband sitting in the bobcat, looking like he's doing stone-work, etc. I put together a slide show and it's hilarious because it looks like he built the pool single-handedly. I added music from Gloria Gaynor's "Do It Yourself" and dissolves between the slides are water droplets. If I can figure out how to put it out on the web I'll show it to you. In the meantime...here he is on day one digging the pool. As always, click on the picture for a larger view.

Novel News:
I'm writing ALL weekend. I'm gonna finish it if it's the last thing I do!

POOL: Day Sixteen

2006-05-16T20:55:00.000-07:00

The tile guys finished up today. Wow, I have to say they are truly artists and I am humbled by their expertise. They actually formed the stones to fit in exact patterns with a sledge hammer. And they worked fast, too! Soooooo...here's a close-up of the spa with it's two stair-step spillways. I found this design on the website of a California pool company, showed the picture to the guys yesterday and voila! In the french vanilla I think it's even more impressive than the CA mansion's.

Here's a long shot taken into the sun. If you squint you can imagine water in the pool...

POOL: Day Fifteen

2006-05-15T20:54:00.000-07:00

Remember my search for the perfect stone? Well today was French Vanilla coping day, along with China Blue tile and Castle Rock for the raised beam. And as luck would have it I took the day off because I'm on the last chapter of my book, so I was supposed to be writing it...but there was some MAJOR work going on in my backyard, which I found extremely interesting.
Around noon:

At the end of the day:

In case you're wondering, I did manage to edit about 4 chapters and write 7 more pages.

POOL: Day Ten

2006-05-10T20:27:00.000-07:00

They poured the gunite today. Now the pool looks like a castle to me. I don't understand how they make the stuff stick to the sides. It seems like it would run down into the bottom.

POOL: Day Five

2006-05-06T13:42:00.000-07:00

Here's a view from the upstairs gameroom. This is a good view of the "belly" wire. They installed what's called the "stub" plumbing on Friday...that's the white PVC pipe. It's been raining so you can see how the pool's beginning to fill up in the deep end. They're supposed to pour the gunite on Monday (Lord willin' and the lake doesn't rise.)

POOL: Day Three

2006-05-04T19:53:00.000-07:00

We're moving right along here, despite the rainy weather. Living next to the lake there's lots of fauna who seem excited about the pool, too. Early birds (sorry, John, not sure what kind) were out in the mud this morning pulling up their breakfast. And ducks seemed to look longingly at the massive hole, waiting for the rain to fill it up.

Inspectors from the city came today but it was "red tagged" as not ready to inspect. I think they have to do the plumbing first but I won't know anything for sure until tomorow.

POOL: Day One

2006-05-03T19:47:00.000-07:00

They don't waste any time when bobcats are charging by the hour. You want a big hole in your backyard? You got it! It really is exciting. While the pool's being built I keep imagining how our project will change the appearance of the satellite map at our longitude and latitude. Okay...so it's not a pyramid...but probably the closest thing I'll come to building one.

BEFORE:

AFTER:

On Taking Stone for Granite

2006-04-23T21:12:00.000-07:00

Have you ever thought about stone? We went to a stone store on Saturday to pick out the coping for our pool. For those of you not familiar with the word "coping" (I wasn't either until we built our last pool) it's the top edge that surrounds the pool. They used to use concrete or brick but now the "style" is a more natural looking stone.

According to our pool builder, it can be a very expensive mistake if you don't choose your stone wisely. Your decisions are literally "set in stone." I have to admit I haven't thought much about stone...but when you're trying to decide what color you want your pool to be you start thinking about it...and noticing it. Stone is everywhere! Stone walls, stone fences, stone buildings, stone steps, stone fireplaces...the list goes on and on. (I'm reminded of Forest Gump's shrimp boat friend).

So we go to the stone place. It's a modest building with a few offices and a small showroom. The guy walks us out back and WOW...It's a huge graveled area with piles and piles of stone. And they come in all sorts of colors from all over the place...Oklahoma Flagstone, Tennesee Blue Gray, Pennsylvania Lilac and some with names like Arizona Chocolate, Cherry Rock Flag and Cafe Blend... by the time we were through...I was starting to get hungry!

We ended up deciding on the Colorado French Vanilla...sounds yummy doesn't it? They gave me a small piece and OMG...it's heavy. Of course you would expect something sold by the ton to have a little weight to it. The whole time I'm wondering what the shipping charge would be to send one of those piles UPS. My husband asked the sales guy how they get their stone and I said "they dig it up" but I was immediately corrected. No! They BLAST it up. I looked closer at my stone pile and checked for burn marks...

Of course I've heard of a rock quarry...but I never really thought about it...ya know?

BTW...here's a pic of French Vanilla.
It's a smooth stone because they cut it. As a matter of fact, I managed to pick out the least natural-looking stone on the lot. I wanted my stone to look manmade...lol.

They're supposed to start digging the pool on Friday. If they hit stone on the dig it will cost $800 extra to blast it out. Maybe I could use that for my coping and save the $300 a ton for the French Vanilla.

More as it develops.

Another Reason to Love Friday

2006-04-19T20:02:00.000-07:00

We got some good news today at work. They are now offering us "Flexible Fridays" where if you work 9 hours for 4 days you can leave at noon on Friday. You can only take 10 of these shortened Fridays a year but these sound like they will come in handy to write. It's just another way our new HR guy is trying to make it a better place to work...YOU GO BOY!

Writing News: I got word from my agent that a Canadian Publisher has requested to look at CurvyKathy31: Confessions of a Chat Addict. I love it when these opportunities pop up out of nowhere!

Goodbye Ace! Another American Idol bites the dust...and I really hated to see this one go. He was just downright pretty to look at!

See...

I still think Chris has the best, most unique voice and if he made a single of his version of I Walk The Line...I would buy it. But in the end I think the little girls will vote in Katherine.